i talked to A's social worker on monday to find out if it was even a possibility for me to adopt him. she said no. he's not ready to be in a family and he needs the "strength and discipline of a father". yeah. so i'm totally disgusted with the whole system, and finally wrote an email to my sw to tell her that. i'm sure that she'll "lose" it though so she doesn't have to even respond. i'm so frustrated, but the thought of starting over is totally horrifying. it's been a year and a half!! you'd think i was looking for a completely healthy caucasian infant, the holy grail of adoption. i'm gonna ask for advice from the state resource center. see what they suggest. i can hardly bare the thought of christmas right now.
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